BRISBANE : With much fanfare, like the swearing in of a new Knight of the Garter, Premier Campbell Newman, Treasurer Tim “Slim” Nicholls and Deputy Premier Jeff Seeney launch election costings . Oops! There is a $200million “obvious typo” in the document .
CANBERRA : Sir Lancelot says Campbell Newman is a strong leader , with strong plans , strong border protection that keeps out undesirables from Canberra.
TOWNSVILLE : Enter the Tasmanian tigress , Senator Jacqui Lambie, who sets up a pill box outside the Lavarack military barracks and reminds the ADF voters and passing motorists to send a message through the Queensland election that the Abbott government should be hung high and low for cutting the pay of troops .Onya Jacqui!
MOUNT ISA : Out this way , the hills have reverberated for ages to the relayed radio comments of Sydney shockjocks. As a result, the largely receptive audience is gunning for Brisbane and Canberra and Katter mark lll of the KAP and dynasty is riding high in the saddle . One of Little Darwin’s informants spends a lot of time in the outback and said Katter , not sure which one , walked into a pub at the “Curry”-Cloncurry- and said the drinks were on him. As a result Katter is king out in the parched Injun terrain. In this vast region Federal Agriculture Minister Barnaby Joyce is regarded as usefull as tits on a bull and not much chop in a Canberra Liberal dominated dogfight.
MAGNETIC ISLAND : The ALP island branch secretary ,Linda Wootten, a wildlife carer , has been distracted from campaigning by a request from a woman to arrange the removal of two Death Adders. Trying to remove the Newman Government is a mammoth task , dwarfed by the problem of how to deal with an obvious family of vipers in your territory.A crocodile has been seen cruising about the island , Linda draws the line at tackling a saurian .