Top New York nip, tuck and stitch expert gowns up for lip job on PM. With him is comely Hollywood nurse , Cuddles.
CANBERRA : A top American cosmetic surgeon who fills up the cracks and crannies of Hollywood B grade movie stars and monsters has been flown in to secretly stitch up the lips of PM Tony Abbott in a drastic bid to improve his ratings.
Several commentators, including one on the ABC Insiders , said Tony Abbott should never be left alone in control of his own mouth . Witness the stunned mullet expressions on the world leaders at the expensive Brisbane G20 gabfest when he bleated about his domestic problems, piddling affairs on a global perspective . Recently he followed up with his funny , heh, heh , wink , wink , announcement that the only thing he was good at in cricket was in the art of sledging . This skill??? was super evident throughout his time as Leader of the Opposition , continues with bodyliners and repetitious slogans today , chanted by his locker room mates.
Just last week the PM caused the LNP Funk Bunker in Brisbane to echo to the screams of Campbell Newman mugwumps when he came out and firmly said GPs would be hit with a pay cut . A seasoned political reporter said the blood curdling screams from the LNP campaign room sounded like poor jungle animals caught in a cruel,steel bear trap after hearing the PM mouth off. Once again there was a strong call from within the Coalition for the PM to shut his trap .
Within hours , the Federal Health Minister , Sussan Ley , rushed out ,did a double backflip with tuck, and said the PM was wrong , there would be no attack on GPs...not until after the Queensland quickie election.