Wednesday, March 4, 2020

FOOTLOOSE AND SENILE

There is growing concern  about  the mental health  of a  Little Darwin inmate after  an exasperating  episode involving the disappearance of his smelly thongs . After a  day and a half of searching  high  and  low  ,much  cursing along the way , he could not find the  footwear,  usually left  on the  back  verandah  when  not used.
It got to  the stage that he  blamed the above Cockatoos , furtively eating palm nuts  in the backyard , for flying off  with  the  thongs .  He  had chased them away several times because he  thought they were  also  eyeing  off  the nearby   mandarin  tree , in  protective netting , for  a  raid  on  the  fruit .

He was convinced they had obviously extracted revenge   by stealing the thongs and  lodging  them  high  up  in  the  mountains  with   Big Foot .  

Completely flummoxed , doubting his marbles ,  our man sat  down and  retraced  his  thong  clad footsteps . When  could  he  last remember  wearing them ?

A letter wrongly  delivered  to  his  residence came to mind . It was for a neighbour, so  he had taken  it to her , dodging  the  guard  dogs . Returning home, for some  strange reason , he  recalled  he  had   walked  along the concrete  gutter.
 
The  penny dropped ...had  he  left the thongs at  the neighbour's place ?
 
Once more  braving the guard  dogs, he retraced his footsteps - wearing sandals- and  there were the wretched  thongs, neatly outside  the  front  door . They  had been taken off  when  going  inside  to  deliver  the  letter . Emerging barefooted, he  had  made  it home like a  forgetful  tenderfoot . 
 
No  apology to  the Cockies is  pending  as  he is convinced they  still plan to strip the  mandarin  tree  like  they  did  to  one  down the road.