I have obviously offended the vengeful gods . As punishment, life in this hermetically sealed household has been made painful by the television set deliberately made to experience loss of signal for hours on end . In particular, the ABC, my favourite, is extremely hard to pick up .
If I see any more commercials for Thin Lizzy and exercise machines for the elderly, I will scream . The blood pressure zooms when frantic searching for a station results in Sky popping up , resulting in swearing .Other commercial regulars that became viewable for , thankfully, short periods, defy belief , more cussing .
Late one afternoon , feeling tired , the TV playing up , the ABC signal suddenly came in loud and clear . Hallelujah ! The ABC news dealing with coronavirus indicated that there would soon be a live cross to Canberra for the PM to make a statement .
In the recliner , footrest extended, remote controller in hand , I relaxed , waiting for ScoMo to appear ... and fell asleep .You could say it was a nanny nap , except I am not a nanny , I am a male pumpkin .
Suddenly waking up , the remote control still in my hand , there on the ABC was the PM- weirdly attired, seemingly wearing a crash helmet , no spectacles, dancing about in front of the media !!!!!!
Then he and Minister for Employment and Women ,Senator Michaela Cash , without a whiteboard in sight , below , broke the social distancing law , and continued to jig about for the stunned media rat pack .
In my befuddled and growingly alarmed state , I wondered what terrible latest news these two had revealed to the worried nation while I had briefly slumbered . Then a member of the National Party, below, bounced onto the screen and began to yell and shout, as usual , so some catastrophe had obviously happened .It could have been Little something without specs.
Alarmed by this scene from the national capital , I yelled out to my distant wife , demanded to know if Martians had landed at Wagga Wagga , gone to Canberra and taken over the planet while I kipped ."Silly bugger !" she shouted , this being a common expression of domestic affection ."This is the Kids Show on the ABC! " On hearing this welcome information , I pulled out the ukulele and sang along with the children in Play School .
