Thursday, October 11, 2018

REPORTERS CAUGHT SHORT(HORN) AGAIN AS TOWNSVILLE BURNS

S(h)ipping   Reporter's  latest  scoops cover   ghost  fleet,   climate  change,  a pirate attack  and  an  angry  American admiral . 
Bushfire smoke on  outskirts of  Townsville resembles the sacking of Panama  by Captain Morgan  and  is visible  from  the  sea , sniffed  on  Magnetic Island . Another bigger  plume  the  following  day ; poor  Miss  Piggy , atop Castle Hill , can be heard as far away as  Ingham coughing her lungs out  and  is  in danger of being  turned  into  smoked  bacon .  
 

With monotonous regularity, the  Murdoch Townsville Bulletin newspaper sends a photographer down to  The Strand on the   waterfront  to  get  an  eye candy  shot of  two  young  female  packpackers   to go with a    few puff  pars about  the weather . Smiling   Olga, from the Volga , for example , is  quoted   as saying she  does not think there  will  be a cyclone in  the near future  and she is looking  forward   to  exploring  the  rainforests  further  north , if they have not been  clear felled ,  and   wrestling  a  bunyip  like  President Yeltsin .
 
Our friendly   waterfront scribe, the only one north of  Woop Woop ,  regards this  as   annoying ,   tropical   journalism . To  illustrate his point , he  sailed to The Strand  in his     yacht  to    give the female    backpackers  a  big welcome  on a hot and  windy day  during the week  and  found numerous  unreported   news stories  floating  about  like flotsam and jetsam . The first one was the striking vision of mainland fires  near Townsville at the head of this post .
 The stand out  ghost  fleet  in port  included  two livestock  carriers :  Shorthorn Express   and   Galloway Express, cattle trucks  alongside the latter .There is a puzzle in the name of the second vessel as one of the same , mentioned in the     " shameful record "of  sheep and  cattle, was " thankfully scrapped ", some years ago. Why would  you give another  carrier a discredited name ?
 
 
At a time when the live export of  stock overseas  has  been     and still    is   a red hot  issue you would think the loading  in  port would rate    coverage . Questions  that could be asked : how many cattle , destination ;  from whence  cattle came , in what condition considering the  drought, shortage of feed ;   are some stations now devoid of  stock ; is there an independent stock inspector aboard , if so ,who ; any more shipments  this  year , etcetera 
 
MAGNETIC  ISLAND  TREASURE  GALLEON  /  WILD  PIRATE  EVENING  
The superluxury catamaran MYWAY (above) worth  a buried trove of  looted Spanish dubloons ,  slipped into  the island marina without the media  picking  up  an  interesting  feature  about its  special   features , the colourful   skipper,  the   cruises  it  makes  in northern waters  with select passengers . It dwarfed all other vessels in the marina .  Our S(h)ipping  Reporter  is hot on the  trail of a yarn   about  an islander  who  had  a rum   encounter with  Captain    Morgan  which  left him  looking as if he  had   been  keel-hauled during the night.


Needless to say  , the Victory in the Pacific  Memorial Fountain  in  the garrison city   is still not working  and  Admiral Harry Harris has been heard mutter-in mild ambassadorial reproachful  language-he  would like to have somebody's "ass in a sling"   for  this  intolerable  situation   to  continue  for  so  long .  Three cheers for the Admiral .