Friday, November 28, 2014


The computer  is  playing  up  and  refuses to  perform instructions . It will not justify  some text, the fonts  jump about , spacing  goes haywire . There  is  an epic  post   ready  to  go from an overseas correspondent   but the  text is all over the place . Gnash, gnash .   Scores of other articles  should be worked on , but  are  set  aside  because  of   the  irritating  problem. 

As I sit hunched over the bothersome computer , day and night , bitten by what seem to  be  sandflies, it is like a scene from  the British  comedy  Little Britain –which inspired the name of  this blog- and  the  equally   mad   Fawlty Towers.  In  Little Britain there was a skit  where  the computer frequently refused to make  a booking  when asked to do so.  My computer makes  me  so  angry  I feel like   emulating  Basil Fawlty  who  beat his  car with a branch  when it played up .  I get the urge to  dash outside , grab  one  of  the  irksome many fallen  palm fronds ,   come  back inside and use it to  whip the  devilish  computer . 

The computer may  be  getting revenge  because I left it behind in Queensland when we  went to Darwin for two weeks to  see  our new great granddaughter  and attend our son’s 50th birthday party in the casino.  

While in Darwin I was given the use of a small computer which had been dumped by an accursed  French  backpacker  next  to a  garbage  bin . It  also said  non in a  most  infuriating way . 

For example : to   get  the letter  A , you pressed Q ; for W you hit the last letter of the alphabet which  this computer has long  refused to show ; M was  a real  surprise-? .  No  wonder  the  EU is in a diabolical  economic mess  if  its  computers  perform like this  deranged  one. 

Driven to a   frenzy  by the  monster , I flung it aside and  tried  to access   Little Darwin online  from three  other computers ,  two in the Legislative Assembly parliamentary library , and  they all said NO!!!  It  was enough to make  me  want to  hit the  red  wine  in a  big way at the Friday Club  luncheon  and  fall  down in  a  swoon in  the Noodle House. Going on the screeching of the Curlews  outside  they  are just as neurotic  as  am  I .