Jeff Kennett has been busier than a zambuc man in an AFL grand final match ever since Kevin Rudd was showered with praise during his recent trip to America and the G20 talks in London. It seems everybody from the US president to the Tele Tubbies and the Spice Girls said our Kevin is a great guy, doing a grand job and capable of walking on water .
The born to rule brigade in Australia could not believe their ears when the Archbishop of Canterbury said Rudd was like the second coming , the Queen gave Kev a private audience and Madonna tried to adopt our PM which, we understand, Therese was only too happy to arrange. Rudd is now nearly as popular as Santa and his red nosed reindeer.
All this kudos has infuriated the bitchy Coalition back home which has become deeply depressed , resulting in many calls for help from Kennett’s admirable Beyond Blue organisation which helps people cope with Winston Churchill’s Black Dog.
Forget the Coalition chanting feeble slogans like RUDD’S CASH SPLASH , they are now so disheartened by the praise for Rudd - and their low standing in the polls- that many of them grind their teeth at night , suffering from RUDD’S GNASH GNASH . As a result , many members of the Shadow Ministry now sleep on the couch with Tiddles or Spot , banished there by their spouses who want a good night's sleep.
That grinding of molars increased when a top Young Liberal appeared on TV in what was unkindly described as an alcopop enhanced performance. Kennett’s phone has been busier than a pizza shop on pay night ever since this promising young Libber with a built in voice scrambler went on the box to make crystal clear the True Blue cause .
Meanwhile, the RAAF VIP fleet catering service has expanded its menu to include lotus sandwiches and coffee made from Mongolian yak milk for the PM . After dinner Fortune cookies and SPAM snacks have also been added to the mile high tucker treats *
The born to rule brigade in Australia could not believe their ears when the Archbishop of Canterbury said Rudd was like the second coming , the Queen gave Kev a private audience and Madonna tried to adopt our PM which, we understand, Therese was only too happy to arrange. Rudd is now nearly as popular as Santa and his red nosed reindeer.
All this kudos has infuriated the bitchy Coalition back home which has become deeply depressed , resulting in many calls for help from Kennett’s admirable Beyond Blue organisation which helps people cope with Winston Churchill’s Black Dog.
Forget the Coalition chanting feeble slogans like RUDD’S CASH SPLASH , they are now so disheartened by the praise for Rudd - and their low standing in the polls- that many of them grind their teeth at night , suffering from RUDD’S GNASH GNASH . As a result , many members of the Shadow Ministry now sleep on the couch with Tiddles or Spot , banished there by their spouses who want a good night's sleep.
That grinding of molars increased when a top Young Liberal appeared on TV in what was unkindly described as an alcopop enhanced performance. Kennett’s phone has been busier than a pizza shop on pay night ever since this promising young Libber with a built in voice scrambler went on the box to make crystal clear the True Blue cause .
Meanwhile, the RAAF VIP fleet catering service has expanded its menu to include lotus sandwiches and coffee made from Mongolian yak milk for the PM . After dinner Fortune cookies and SPAM snacks have also been added to the mile high tucker treats *
