Sunday, July 31, 2016


Jones slips on red  banana skin , takes a  dive .
After what seemed like a count longer than that in the infamous  Jack Dempsey v Gene Tunney  heavyweight  championship fight of 1927,  it was  announced  after   29 days  that   Cathy O'Toole ( ALP ), aka the Red Rocket ,   had  delivered the  winning  punch  in the  battle for the vital Queensland seat of  Herbert  by  37 votes .The actual  declaration and handing over of the embossed champion's belt  by the Australian Electoral Commission   will  be  made later  this  week in  its square ring office in the Townsville  CBD. 
 Feisty  Cathy  O'Toole, displaying  fancy footwork ,  delivered  a  haymaker  blow  which  sent   Ewen Jones (LNP )   to  the canvas  like a  bag of  wet bagasse  and  shocked  Cuban cigar smoking  Coalition   backers  sitting  ringside with  their  floozies. 

In a n exclusive  interview with  Ring Magazine , protesting   fight promoter  , One Punch Louie , a  former  horizontal heavyweight ,    today  said   Jones had  been  robbed , that he has more  fans than  Cathy  and  Elvis Presley  put together ,   and   would  demand  a  rematch with  O'Toole at the Lavarack Army Barracks. In preparation for  the  fight, Jones is  skipping , chasing Pokémons  along   The Strand  and  daily  trundling up and down Castle Hill , doing the   Burdekin  Sugar  Plum   Dance to  get  himself  into tip top shape. 

Loquacious   Louie  strongly denied  rumours that  Ewen  is going to take  up  Greek wrestling  and  could be a late entrant in the Rio Olympic Game in the Russian  team .