Thursday, December 5, 2013

AUSTRALIA ON ROAD TO RIO

Eyes Peeled , Glum Bunch With  Banana  Republic   Message
PAUL KEATING'S WARNING  that  Australia is  in  danger of   becoming  a  banana  republic is coming true  . It  has  just  been  revealed  that  the Abbott   Government  has long   planned  to  turn   the  country into  the ugly twin of the   South  American  country , Brazil, where  large sections of the  populace,  like our  own  banana state,  Queensland , are   currently  calling   for  the  sacking  of   the  government,  instead  of  dancing  in  the streets .   Tony   Abbott  and  his  dynamic team  in   their   pre-election  brochure, above, cunningly boasted  they   had   REAL SOLUTIONS  FOR  ALL AUSTRALIANS . What  they  did  not  say  is  that  the  REAL   is   the  weak   currency of   Brazil- known  in   the  money changing trade  as  the  BRL  - which  is worth less  than the  Aussie dollar , a  million of  our  bucks  worth  more  than  two  million REALS.   Thus  PM  Abbott  is  one  hundred  percent  truthful  when  he  now insists   his government  is honouring  all  of  its  (codlin moth)  core  promises , especially  in  relation to  education  expenditure , except  that  it  is secretly denominated  in   BRLs , not  AUD  terms .  Dreary economists  expect  this  clever   clause  in  the  Coalition   policy  statement  will   soon  see   many  workers  in  Australia    joyously  singing   the   Banana  Boat  Song .

Meanwhile ,  members   of  the  Abbott  Government’s  Cheer Squad  at The Australian newspaper   have  stopped  wearing  Junior  Chamber of  Commerce  suits  and  now   sport   orange   trousers  ,  lairy shirts    and   do   Peter  Allen   imitations , flashing   their   castanets ,  shaking   their   hips like Clive  Palmer  ,  kicking  up  their   legs ,  in  the  expectation   they  will  be   flown  to  Rio in a  VIP   jet   for   a   wedding  or  three.   Latest  Canberra   tip   is  that  jivey  Foreign Minister ,  Julie   Bishop , will  fly to  Rio  in  the  Leap Year  to  take  part  in  a  Samba  Marathon   with   Hugh   Jackman.