Lumbering out of distant , mist shrouded rural electorates have come the terrifying hairy creatures , Yowies, better known as independents. These three metre tall , howling, smelly monsters strike fear into the hearts of our political leaders. One particularly fearsome beast wears a cowboy hat , a three-piece Savile Row suit and is armed with a .45 calibre banana which he threatened to insert up the sago palm of a trembling Townsville chimp.
Plans are being made to capture the Yowies when they next set foot in Canberra to emulate King Kong climbing the Empire State Building by scampering to the top of parliament house with Julia Gillard screaming for mercy . Once netted they will become part of Tim the Yowie Man's Destiny Trips which specialises in weird Canberra ghosts ,poltergeists and history tours ( Coming soon : Rare interview with a fearless Yowie hunter and Territory sightings .)
