SHIVER ME TIMBERS ! WHALE OF A TALE

In a bizarre prediction, Little Darwin said the election contest for the seat of Herbert in North Queensland could end in the political death of a person who is dragged into the depths by a pod of frolicking whales. We wish to make it known that this preposterous scenario was exaggerated -it only required a single run of the mill albino whale to end his life. According to an eyewitness account, a rope attached to a harpoon made out of a steel post from a white shoe brigade's building site KEEP OUT sign wrapped around Captain Ahab's false ivory leg and yanked him screaming into the briny. Passengers on a Magnetic Island ferry , namely Rebecca and Chas. , attempted to save the unfortunate fellow with a barge pole and a flensing knife and later had to receive counselling for hysterical laughter.