Exclusive coded dispatch from unworldly Pommie reporter William Boot , who normally writes nature notes in the Mother Country, sent to Queensland by doddering British media magnate Lord Copper to cover the colonial election uprising .
Nothing much happened in the far north of the Sunshine State during the week , except the Cowboys got beaten . A mysterious drilling rig is anchored in international waters, above , off Townsville . According to Little Darwin's well informed Shipping Reporter ,with whom I had an arm wrestle in Molly Malone's Irish Pub during a heavy drinking session , put on my expense account, naturally , the rig will be used to mine rich deposits of boofheads in the area if the Heinrich Morrison Government is re-elected .
Strangely , no local media people noticed the rig, which stands out like a rocket launching pad . The obliging Shipping Reporter said this is not unusual and also showed me how to wear my pith helmet the right way round .
It sounds incredible, but there is a report that a Malaysian fakir wanted by Interpol nailed himself to an overweight spiny anteater in Dawson and refused to be deported. Received a nice snap of Cairns , below , from a pelican who is an avid reader of my reports .
The Townsville newspaper is doing an imitation of the old Fleet Street Thunderer , demanding people sign pledges to make sure that cooking the Great Barrier Reef is regularly featured in MKR . Incidentally , the Dodo colony in the Townsville Bulletin building is moulting and I am feeding them with some of the container load of seed my mother ordered me to give to the threatened Black Fronted Finches in barbaric North Queensland.
