CANBERRA : Soon to appear in the deep end of a swimming pool near you is the synchronised swimming duet team of Michaela Cash and Scott Morrison . This is a desperate attempt to show that men and women get along swimmingly like a tin of packed Norwegian sild sardines in the Coalition Canberra bubble bloodbath pool .
Argust Tuft Scoop
As not many women get the chance to swim against the Liberal Party male toxic algal bloom , it was hard to find a person in a skirt to take part in another obvious Scomo photo opportunity stunt . It is well known that Morrison can do an Olympic swimming champion imitation , or any other faux imitation for that matter , even that of a PM , at the drop of a hat, or a body falling to the party room floor,oozing blood from many stab wounds.
However, Michaelia Cash , seen here wearing a special striped Jantzen aquatic cossie, who has the capacity to speak under water at a depth of 40 fathoms , scaring off WA white pointer sharks in the process, was eager to become part of the synchronised swimming duo.
Their first performance will be in the new $70million Aquatic Centre in Perth, for which treasurer Josh Freydenberg , wearing budgie smugglers blessed by a rabbi, donated $20million . Ms Cash is also famous in showbiz circles for her dance of the seven thinly veiled whiteboards on ballbearings , which rated higher than Pauline Hanson's dance with the Stars and Stripes and the NRA .