Top New York nip, tuck and stitch expert gowns up for lip job on PM. With him is comely Hollywood nurse , Cuddles.
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CANBERRA : A top American cosmetic surgeon who fills up the cracks and crannies of Hollywood B grade movie stars and monsters has been flown in to secretly stitch up the lips of PM Tony Abbott in a drastic bid to improve his ratings.
Several commentators, including one on the ABC Insiders , said Tony
Abbott should never
be left alone in control of his own mouth
. Witness the stunned mullet expressions on the world leaders at the
expensive Brisbane G20
gabfest when he bleated
about his domestic problems, piddling affairs
on a global perspective . Recently
he followed up with
his funny , heh, heh , wink ,
wink , announcement that the only thing he was good at in cricket
was in the art of
sledging . This skill??? was super evident throughout
his time as Leader of the Opposition ,
continues with bodyliners
and repetitious slogans today , chanted by his locker room mates.
Just last week the PM caused the LNP Funk Bunker in Brisbane to echo to the screams of Campbell Newman mugwumps when he came out and firmly said GPs would be hit with a pay cut . A seasoned political reporter said the blood curdling screams from the LNP campaign room sounded like poor jungle animals caught in a cruel,steel bear trap after hearing the PM mouth off. Once again there was a strong call from within the Coalition for the PM to shut his trap .
Within hours , the Federal Health Minister , Sussan Ley , rushed out ,did a double backflip with tuck, and said the PM was wrong , there would be no attack on GPs...not until after the Queensland quickie election.