LASHINGS FROM CANBERRA BEAT

 

 An   occasional  series covering the   posturing  , stumbles ,  frequent  flying , wedding cake  poisoning     and   the  19^th century born to  rule mentality  of   the   Tory   government  by   seasoned- often pickled-  award   winning  political  writer,  Argus Tuft , and  striking  social  writer ,  Madam   Lash .  Argus  Tuft   kindly  dug  out  the above  Broadside    cartoon ,  by  a  familiar illustrator,   Peter  Burleigh , a descendant  of  Guy Fawkes ,   from  the   good  old   days  when   misogynist Tories  ruled  and   only  allowed  tea  ladies  on  the  premises.  Tuft  says  it  will  help  the new  right wingers  in  parliament  understand  why  the  old crew  of  Screech Owls now  ruling  the  roost   has  gone  back  to  the  future.  Warning : This cartoon has a sexist  remark  which Gen Y  readers  may not understand ... ask  your  mother  or  grannie  the meaning  of  WAC.

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No 50  shades of  grey  for  Tony Abbott at  the opening of  parliament  as it  seems  he has  gone  prematurely black–as  Mungo  MacCallum (?)  brilliantly  said  of   Andrew  Peacock  who had shown signs of going  grey, which rapidly disappeared. ***  The  puerile    parroting of   slogans   persists    with    the   Mad  Monk  leading  the  chorus  ad  nauseam:   Shorten’s   Bill,   Shorten’s  Carbon  Copy,   My   Bill  to  end  Your  Bill    ( all  said  with  a  schoolboy  smirk ).*** Fashionista   Madam  Lash  insists  that  bimbo   Julie  Bishop’s  Melbourne Cup  fascinator , drawn  by  that  wonderful cartoonist,   David  Rowe , of   the  Australian Financial Review , is actually a spying  device enabling her  to  pick up derogatory remarks made  behind her  back   by  colleagues who got her  removed  as  Shadow Treasurer  . Google says  a new  Julie Bishop  website  will  be launched soon , any  ideas what  it will  include  ?... THE  EYES HAVE  IT (sorry).   *** There  are reliable reports that  author , commentator   Bob  Ellis  is  on   powerful  new medication and  daily doses of       licorice impregnated  oxygen and laughing gas  to  fortify  himself  for the   truly astonishing sight of  seeing  Bronwyn Bishop  , she  who lusted   after   the  Prime Ministership,  sitting on  high  , wigged and  gowned ,  on  the  Speaker’s throne .   Ellis , who  once  stood against   Bishop ( election-wise, not  in  the vertical  ) ,  is  suffering  from  uncontrollable  giggling, according to  close mates , deeply worried  about  his  condition .