CANBERRA: It has just been revealed Queensland Premier, "Tin Can Canoe" Campbell Newman , inspired the Coalition's latest brilliant plan to buy up all the leaky boats in the Indonesian archipelago to stop the flow of refugees. Premier Newman said the Queensland economy is like el sicko Spain . The Coalition's Dirty Tricks Department thought this a wonderful appellation , which could be used to rubbish the entire nation , despite the fact that Australia is the only OECD country not to sink like Titanic 11 due to the GFC, thanks to the ALP's classic Keynesian stimulation of the economy to prevent a massive slump.
A Tory Think
Tank mugwump, Ned Nasty , pointed out that
to make Australia
really look like Spain, it
needed an armada
of ships . Hence the
inspired announcement
by Tony Abbott
to buy 750,000
leaky Indonesian
bumboats. Part of
this huge Spanish Armada will
be used as targets for
joint bombing
exercises on the Great
Barrier Reef ; providing boating
trips on Lake Burley
Griffin ; lashed together to form a pontoon
from Darwin to Mandorah , doing away with
the need to build
an expensive bridge ; cheap accommodation for underpaid 457 Visa workers . Treasury has
estimated the cost
of buying all the Indonesian boats will
be many times greater
than all the
gold the Spanish
fleets brought home
after Cortes conquered and
plundered Mexico.
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Meanwhile
, famous Spanish painter , Pablo Picasso, has kindly supplied
Little Darwin with
this stunning impression
of the Mad Monk fleshing out one
of the Coalition’s policies. Art experts will immediately notice the painting is a combination of Pablo’s
surrealism , Gravox instant gravy and worker soup kitchen
cubist style , with a hidden message about the Guernica like fate likely to befall the nation.