Saturday, December 31, 2016

JURASSIC PARK NUDIST BEACH SHOCK HORROR MYSTERY

After  the Australian National  Lampoon Christmas  Story in  this blog  , it is hard to believe  that  an even stranger  yarn  has  come to light  in  the  Queensland silly season .

It involves a tradesman  with a  wife, a  former journalist , suffering  from a stroke and  partial memory loss . Engaged to  do  some  work on a house in Brisbane , the husband  brought  his wife along  with him  and she sat with the  woman  owner  and  talked  ,  while  he got on with  the  job .

During   discussion , Magnetic Island  was mentioned , which caused  the visiting  woman to say  she  and  her husband  had been there  several  times , once  shedding  their  clothes  on   the   nudist  beach .

However , there  had been a  nasty experience at the nudist beach .  Something  big and  frightening  had  jumped  up !  What ???? The woman  could not remember  because of her  memory  loss .  Her husband was then asked what   this  awful  thing had been  which had  frightened his wife  on the sun drenched isle... a  large , hissing   Frilled-necked Lizard . Like nudists , such   lizards like  sunning themselves  au  natural  ,  can  stand  on  their  back legs  like a Dinosaur  and  run  at  high  speed .   
Frightening   giant  rabbit   nibbling  on   ridge  above  popular  Magnetic  Island  nudist  beach .
It seems  Magnetic Island  beaches hold  many surprises for those  who  bare  their flesh   as a  Cairns resident  recently recalled  he had  been stung by March   flies   while  helping  make  a  commercial   for  German  beer  on  one  . And right now  March flies  are on the march  leading to a slap happy  time while watering  the  garden .

According to the   authoritative  Magnetic  Times newspaper which , unfortunatelybuzzed off , the  male  March fly , it seems , is a silly fellow who never takes no  for  an  answer  until  he comes to a  sticky end  . Attracted to the   salt and sweat of a  human , he stings when he lands and  sucks  away . Like a mug , he  keeps on  coming back  when   brushed  away  until  he  eventually ends up   on his back ,  daid ,  due  to  a  mighty  swat .