CANBERRA : Award winning political reporter Argus Tuft today broke the startling news that ASIO has long had a mole deep inside the Russian embassy . Code-named Fred , he has revealed why the Russians are refusing to move from the proposed new embassy site next to parliament house .
According to " Fred ", who also goes under the Barbie Doll name , "Ken ", the proposed new embassy is part of global Operation Save the Mad Czar of Moscow , which will provide padded bolt hole funk bunkers for Vladimir Putin when he is on the run during the next Russian revolution , like the current one involving the Wagner group, which could see him strung up like Mussolini .
Tuft claims the planned Canberra bunker is similar to the Berlin one in which Hitler and Eva Braun came to an end . In Putin's case , it will contain a blow up Olga from the Volga doll as no sane woman would keep company with him .
