CANBERRA : There has been a dramatic improvement in the relationship between Australia and China , according to award winning political reporter, Argus Tuft .
Argus says President Xi Jinping has agreed to once again open up China to the processing of smelly Australian plastic / political garbage , the first shipment to contain the former PM who is on the nose with so many people , there being many calls to bin him , even for him to retreat to a closed order nunnery .
According to Argus, ScoMo will be pulped and turned into reconstituted Manchurian dim sims , exported back to Australia , sold to yokels who vote for the Nationals , Pauline Hanson, crocodile obsessed Katter , asset- stranded billionaires . See what the Pope had to say about ScoMo in the following wordly cartoon .
In an exclusive interview , the Chinese leader revealed he made the decision to accept Aussie rubbish on the day of the recent 50th anniversary of Gough Whitlam , AKA Superman , being elected PM .
Whitlam, he said , had been a great friend of China's , having opened up dialogue with Chairman Mao . On the other hand , Scott Morrison , President Xi explained , while Prime Minister , had made derogatory remarks about Anthony Albanese being the most socialist leader of the ALP since Whitlam, a deliberate slur .
He had also described Albanese as the Manchurian Candidate . a feeble jibe that you would expect to read in a fortune cookie .
As a result, the Chinese leader told Argus Tuft it would give him great pleasure to bin ScoMo and hear him, as pressure and Chinese water torture is applied , squeal like a stray , mangy Cronulla cat being jumped on at a Hill Song rage party during a Covid lockdown .
