Syndicated British astrologer Jonathan Cainer who provided columns for the London Daily Mail and Murdoch newspapers in Australia died early this month... yet his star talk continues , and you can actually phone him for a personal message . How is this so ?
News Corp papers gave differing explanations . In the case of the May 10 edition of the Northern Miner , Charters Towers, Queensland , it said he had "passed away " early last week. Fortunately, he had prepared his astrological readings well ahead of publication and the Miner would continue to publish these ; the paper would also like to share "in this space" some of " Jonathan's inspiring quotes."
Under each sign of the zodiac write up , the reader was invited by the now dear departed astrologer , to ring a number for details about the mystic power of the Transit of Mercury .
The Townsville Bulletin handled the death a little differently in the May 13 edition, each star gazing reader of the Zodiac Forecasts given the heartening news that you could "hear Jonathan's wisdom in your latest prediction by ringing 1900 959 005" .
Eager to find out what the stars have to say today, this blogger bought the May 16 edition of the Townsville Bulletin , checked the page 2 index to see Stars and Sudoku were on page 34. Shock, horror . On the said page 34 there was weather and comics. How could I plan my day without knowing what is written in the stars according to Jonathan ?
Hastily leafing through the paper , he was found under Lifestyle ( not very apt for a guy who has recently died ) next to puzzles and wretched sudoku . However, you can still receive his wisdom on 1900 959 005.
News of his death naturally received much publicity in the UK, where he also appeared on television, which may soon drop out of the EU orbit . The Daily Mail said the astrologer was so popular with its readers that many of them would not venture out of their house without first reading his predictions, which does not say much for the IQ of the readers.
No reflection on the dear departed Cainer and his columns, said to be read by 12 million , including some through the Botswana Echo , but many years ago this blogger was present in a Sydney pub when the late , highly talented journalist and author , Jim "Flasher" Oram , who once went on a bender with Irish dramatist Brendan Behan resulting in the pride of Ireland, famously saying he was a drinker with writing problems, collapsing and being admitted to hospital, gave some advice to a budding astrologer about how to write a column for the media .
This rather odd , scruffy fellow looked as if he had been living in a lunar crater most of his life. Oram firmly told him the star column he wrote for a magazine was deadly dull and that he should , in effect, sex it up with all kinds of mystical verbiage .
The shocked astrologer did indeed sex things up and became something of a shooting star in the entertainment/showbiz world . In next to no time he was being interviewed on radio and TV and appeared salubrious.
Britishers who believe in the stars have been told that Cainer's nephew just happens to be an astrologer and he will carry on the work . It will be interesting to see how long Australian newspapers continue to run his uncle's columns and what they do to fill the gap on the weather / lifestyle pages .
And if you still believe your fate is written in the stars and kindly printed in the tabloids , let me inform you that the man who wrote the stars in the Northern Territory News , Darwin , light years ago, was Jim Kelly, above, the sports reporter, who could often be seen sitting at his desk, shirtless , long socks rolled down , a fag in his mouth (Temple Bar ) , beer nearby , pounding out Heaven's secrets. While imbibing in the Workers' Club one thirsty day , he overheard a customer say he had put off a light plane flight over a long weekend because of a warning in The Stars column in the NT News .
