Treasurer Scott Morrison told the Australian media at the National Press Club in Canberra it will have to be patient as the Budget will develop like a Test Match .
Much to the consternation of Channel 9 Wide World of Sport , SkySport , Fox Sport, Wally World and Disneyland, Little Darwin has secured the exclusive rights to the looming sensational Australian Test Cricket Budget which promises to be nastier than the infamous 1932-33 bodyline series in which the Pommie bounder Douglas Jardine ordered his bowlers to aim for the Aussie gizonkas .
From a secret location somewhere in the big end of town , the tyro Australian Test team captain , Malcolm Turnbull , discusses Budget spin and voter catching techniques with Little Johnny Howard , also known as the cat in an Akubra hat. A well known cricket tragic, Howard stunned Pakistan with his bowling prowess - able to make the ball perform like a cat on a hot tin roof just after having been desexed by the vet . It also caused Warnie to tear out his hair and head for the jungle . After the instructive chat , Turnbull has already started sledging the opposition .
There is growing speculation that Turnbull will pad up quickly, block supply and then quick as a flash reintroduce worthless Malcolm Fraser three dollar bills with which to pay workers. Our team of freeloading cricket writers , firm believers in payola , have compiled an amazing series for our massive readership.
 |
From left field , Bronwyn Bishop has been lined up to be the Test drinks boy, hovering on the boundary with gin and tonic , Grange, hemlock and smelling salts , heckled by the prominent Hillite journalist and cad , Bob Ellis .
|
Top subjects to be covered in the future include Tony Abbott's most painful cricket moment , with photo ; Labor's nasty negative sneering policy ; confessions of a maiden over ; ball and vote tampering and the Conservative pollie most suited for silly point , selected from a large field, including a number of Bananalanders.
