CANBERRA : There are growing fears here that there is a spreading outbreak of the dreaded French Revolution Syndrome in Coalition ranks . First indications were numerous reports of bedwetting in/on Tory seats. This caused great embarrassment and anxiety in conservative circles .
Now medical authorities report a growing number of true blue politicians displaying obvious symptoms of Montezuma's Curse who are seen rapidly trotting out of parliament house with Swiss chocolate coated fringe benefits . An overworked doctor in the capital warned the Turnbull government is starting to resemble the classic CIA collapsing dominoes scenario because of all those running for the exit .
Leading urologist , Dr Richard Squeezer , today further warned the situation could lead to an explosion in dead testicle cases in politicians caused by wearing pre-loved , tight budgie smugglers, riding racing bikes uphill , dancing on marble tabletops , slipping on banana skins and feral onions in media photo opportunities staged at zoos , limp falling on overseas study trips and foolishly taking part in charity mediaeval jousting competitions with tricky Sir Lancelot , related to the evil Sheriff of Nottingham , who often hits below the belt , with painful results , leaving male pollies writhing on the ground in agony , whimpering , sounding like Maid Marian .
