There could surely be no stranger way to mark the first election shots fired in the Legislative Assembly this year than by parking outside the Wedding Cake a well- worn Commodore station wagon resembling an African Zebra. It came complete with an elongated Zebra main made from three large yard broom heads , in line , attached to the centre of the roof ,painted in black and white , adding to the safari shoot out atmosphere. In the bay on the Bennett Street side of the Assembly, without a parking ticket, the car , bearing a NSW numberplate, registration soon to expire, minus all hubcaps , with mud or elephant dung on the bodywork, made this reporter think he had been transported to the great African rift, instead of the Berrimah Line.
Some passing tourists stopped, laughed and admired the Zebra . A woman said that down Mexico way they paint the donkeys up to resemble el cheapo, ersatz Zebras .This is probably done to mislead those unworldly Gringos from across the border who are notoriously ignorant of geography or anything other than Whitney Houston’s tonsils, Michael Jackson's missing glove and his pet chimp,Bubbles.
Inside the Assembly, the Leader of Government Business, tom-tom beating Chris Burns , seen during the Christmas break sporting facial fungus, not contesting the next election, was doing his usual imitation of a Laughing Hyena. His visage frequently conveys the impression of a cross between a grinning Cheshire cat and a pensioner breaking in a new set of false teeth. He let fly with a broadside from his White Hunter special, a Mauser , claiming that there was a" paucity of policy" in the CLP Swahili camp.
A shudder went through the Assembly- on both sides-when he intimated that there were 180 days to go before the election , during which time he would spruik , comment on CLP policies and bellow like a Wildebeest grabbed by the snout by a Nile crocodile during the great Serengeti trek.
As usual, the public galleries were almost devoid of any sign of life. You are more likely to see a copulating Dodo in the special press gallery area than an actual member of the local media. A member of the Assembly staff suddenly came into view and was seen apparently checking to see if there were any stray Zebras , Occupy Wall Street placards or evidence of gunpowder plots in the public galleries.
Looking every inch an Attorney-General , in a suit , Rob Knight , slipped in and out of the chamber to exercise his writ of habeas corpus or reroute a flock of angry Plovers.
Looking every inch an Attorney-General , in a suit , Rob Knight , slipped in and out of the chamber to exercise his writ of habeas corpus or reroute a flock of angry Plovers.
