Overworked Brisbane
detectives are investigating the
theft of the
Liberal National Party’s entire intellectual
property. It was
kept in a velvet- lined thimble
in the LNP strongroom along with other treasures, such as Joh Bjelke-Petersen’s great invention -
the inflatable rubber cricket bat ( now perished), the
secret formula for
turning water into petrol and the Gucci Bible which was the envy of Andrew Peacock. A dinosaur is helping police in
their investigations as the thimble was noticed missing
after Clive Palmer , disguised as
a CIA
agent , accompanied by a 30
metre long pet herbivore , with a forked
tongue , was seen lurking about the
premises . As the tiny piece
of intellectual property is pea green
in colour, the
bellowing , windy, greedy dinosaur may have
thought it a
noxious weed-ragwort- and gobbled it down
.
The disappearance was discovered when the naughty catheter nurse went to the vault to get a packet of re-usable band aids , kept under lock and key by the Health Department , for a politician who was badly injured using his spin drier . As can be expected , the LNP is furious about the theft because it planned to use its priceless intellectual property in a beaut pea and thimble trick. A timid vet is treating the dinosaur suspect for indigestion , inflamed tonsils , delusions of grandeur and frequent flying .