A team of Amazonian women has seized the NT News. Yes, folks, the bastion of hairy – chested journalism has fallen to a gaggle of ruthless Gen Y women. The capture was revealed in the freebie Darwin Sun which described the News as its “ big sister”. Hordes of male chauvinist pigs and unwashed tradies fell from their bar stools on learning that the macho paper has been taken over by a bunch of sheilas. Even more shocking is that the women are all southerners(Spit!) and sit around drinking soy milk caffe latte (Yuk!).
A male member of the newspaper staff escaped the blood -thirsty women by hastily donning a wig and skirt and scampering out the tradesgirls’ entrance. Leader of the invading femmes is Gemima Greer , Queen of the London baked bean environmentally friendly wrestling circuit . In an exclusively interview with this quaking male, Ms Greer, wearing a Viking helmet and filing her battle axe , said that instead of burning their bras , her followers use them to garrotte the bum, tit and crocodile obsessed males who work in newspapers.
Under the new feminine order, gone are yarns about crocs, UFOs, crocs, more crocs , plus or minus a croc, bonking crocs , celebrity crocs , split personality crocs who think they are monkeys , yodelling crocs , albino crocs, polka dot crocs , colour co-ordinated crocs . Ms Greer warned that she plans to slip a savage saurian up the trouser leg of Prime Minister Rudd the next time he comes to Darwin praising people who, self evidently, should be fed to crocodiles. Kevin Rudd’s security guards immediately clamped bicycle clips around his trouser leg cuffs to prevent such an attack which, if successful, would reduce him to a squeaky - voiced Tin Tin.
