Hollywood is planning to shoot a biblical epic bigger than Ben Hur in one of Australia’s retirement villages. Called the Never Ending Loaves and Fishes Story , it is sure to be a smash hit with those members of the accounting fraternity and village owners who feed elderly people on a monotonous diet of el cheapo tucker bought in bulk from Filipino garbage dump scavengers .
Background music for the star studded movie will be the delicious Monty Python hit about Spam , sung by a choir of anorexic geriatrics . A Mega – Gastric- Munchies Studios PR today said the village picked for the shoot will be decided from a list of places renowned for their lean, very mean cuisine .
It is a surprising medical fact that most people suffering from Alzheimer’s Disease can rattle off the monotonous same old fare menu at their retirement village. This is helpful in those establishments which have a massive turnover of staff , especially where the poorly paid instant cook has destroyed the well - thumbed Ethiopian guide for making 1000 tasty meals , including imitation T-bone steak, from lawn clippings .
Thank God for sausage rolls, party pies, sawdust sandwiches, gluggy special treats from another planet and reheated packet soup. These culinary delights cause thankful elderly people to fall down on their knees from malnutrition , thus providing the desired worshipful setting for a whole string of Hollywood extravaganzas made for the overfed , born - again Christian couch potato market in the US.
