FEAR AND LOATHING IN BRIS VEGAS

Little Darwin's roaming gonzo journalist has detected a palpable air of fear and loathing in Queensland politics. Premier Anna Bligh, intelligent, articulate and more presentable than anybody else on her side , is on the nose with the electorate over a number of issues : the massive sell off of state assets, the Traveston Crossing Dam , just knocked back by Peter Garrett, and the feeling that some of the good old boys have had their snouts in the trough like the white shoe brigade and buddies of yesteryear.

A recent survey showed that Bligh is not highly regarded , her ministry so unimpressive few voters can name them. As a result , the Premier, dressed in R.M. Williams gear , looking like a Jillaroo , was seen flying off to far flung areas to try and win hearts and minds without the use of helicopter gunships in what is fast becoming another electoral disaster zone for Labor- PM Kevin Rudd’s own bailiwick . Unions, the police association , koala bear huggers, rare lung fish lovers, turtle ticklers, cod cuddlers and many other sections of the community are unhappy, frothing even . One placard seen on TV read BLIGH BUTCHERS KOALAS , an extreme statement you would expect to see in America during the health brawl. As a result, the government rushed out and announced it will make $15million available to help save Queensland bears.

In the rural areas , Barnaby Joyce , starting to rant like Iron- Bar Tuckey , is warning the men from Marlboro Country that the wicked socialists, communists and city dwellers are going to rape and pillage the economy and take their farms away before the friendly banks get a chance to foreclose on them.

Premier Bligh , goaded by Mr Fitzgerald , has just announced proposed caps to donations to political parties due to the aroma emanating from the too cosy relationship between government and big business , especially developers. If adopted nationwide, the close nexus between unions and the ALP will be further weakened.

The Queensland state Opposition , the Liberal National Party, is not dazzling, and the deep tensions emerged after the pre- selection debacle involving Peter Dutton who committed hari- kiri . Hands up anybody who has heard anything about the LNP leader, John-Paul Langbroek . Our gonzo nomad heard an extraordinary ABC radio interview in Brisbane with Jane Grieve , electorate secretary for Lawrence Springborg, deputy leader of the Liberal National Party , who has written a book, Slippin’ On the Lino. A former Courier Mail columnist who played a leading part in setting up the Stockmen’s Hall of Fame, Longreach, she made amazing statements about highly ambitious Springborg.

She said Springborg, a happily married man , known to iron his own jocks and expose his chest like Boris Putin during unsuccessful election campaigns, wows women. Young women slavered over him and blocked his pathway wanting his attention , she told Spencer Howson, causing Aunty listeners to drop their cans of FourX . Is he a politician or Brad Pitt? Her boss probably scorched his Long Johns, also known as romance busters, when he heard the interview. Then again, he may have slipped under the lino with embarrassment .

That women go ga-ga over him is proof positive that many of the femmes , probably southerners fleeing the cold of Victoria, go about without hats in the Sunshine State and are victims of sunstroke. It makes you wonder if that colourful Joh offsider, the Minister for Everything, rotund Russell Hinze, molester of mud crabs, prawns , bugs and never likely to die from dehydration , depicted by comedian Max Gillies as a man in a bean bag, had a fan club of panting Bananaland babes.