Sunday, March 25, 2012

SCOOP REPORT FROM ISHMAELIA / BANANAVILLE. By award winning bird chaser John Boot of the " Daily Beast"

Nothing much happened here today in this friendly, sun-drenched dictatorship. Speaking from the turret of an American tank, victorious General Cantankerous announced he had changed the name of the country from Ishmaelia to Bananaville.


Bananaville, he explained , is a sexier moniker which will attract tourists back to the country after the recent bloody massacre which thrust him into power. Waving his fly whisk, he then ordered his chanting , jubilant followers , high on crushed coral dust , to invade Ethiopa .


General Cantankerous cut a dashing figure as he rode triumphantly down the main mall on a penny farthing bike to take up residence in the casino overlooking the fast flowing Upper Limpopo. His favourite wife, on roller skates, followed behind and received deafening cheers and wolf whistles as she skittled several city council donkey and camel parking ticket inspectors.