Friday, March 2, 2012

DARWIN SHIPWRECK -Spoof Special


Shipwreck hero Happy Feet and proud, skateboard enthusiast son, Flat Foot; both want to represent Australia in long distance swimming events at the British Olympic Games. Daddy holds a valuable chunk of whale vomit between his feet.
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In breaking news , alarming reports are coming through that an Italian cruise ship packed with 457 visa workers has run aground on the swimming pool at Darwin’s Government House . First indication of the maritime disaster was raised when the flag at Government House was noticed flying upside down for a week , denoting a vessel in distress. Little Darwin has been told that a passenger on the Costa Bundle , Irish backpacker, Paddy DiCaprio, was smooching a girl on the bowsprit when the liner struck the pool. Flung into the deep end, he escaped the passionate embrace of the Kreepy Krauly pool cleaning machine working at full throttle , swam through a school of cane toads, made it to shore, staggered to the flagpole and raised the flag.

The demure damsel he was pashing was last seen floating down Mitchell Street in the company of an American Marine and a Navy Seal . Flares fired from the stricken vessel over following days finally attracted the attention of Darwin’s celebrity penguin, Happy Feet ,who had just been thrown out of a nightclub after picking a fight with a Japanese whaler in town on R &R as reward for sinking a Sea Shepherd boat.


Without hesitation, Happy Feet grabbed a length of rope, waddled down to Government House, narrowly avoiding being arrested for drunkenness , and plunged into the swimming pool. Worried passengers , many from the Philippines ,Timbuktu and Planet Triton, cheered as Happy Feet came to their rescue . After being brought ashore, the passengers will have morning tea at Government House with the Administrator ,who thought the flares were just skyrockets fired off every night in Darwin, proceed to the Wedding Cake for a photo opportunityfor the ministers , and then be used as backfill in the many gaping holes in Darwin’s roads.