PORT OF TOWNSVILLE HAS BOATLOADS MORE MOOS AND BAAS THAN MOOLOOLABA

When the luxury cruise ship Amsterdam , above, left,  diverted to Townsville instead of calling at Mooloolaba on the Sunshine Coast to avoid rough seas  caused by Cyclone Tatiara , it   did not tie up at  the   $85million  wharf 10 cruise ship  terminal ,  the Singapore registered   stock carrier  Diamantina,  a fine Aussie outback  name , right, was  berthed   there  instead, loading  up for Vietnam .

An American  freelance  travel writer   aboard  the  Amsterdam  was  reported as saying it was  great to  make the unexpected visit  to  Townsville because Mooloolaba was  a  place no one could  pronounce.

 As expected , the local media gushed over the Amsterdam 's visit ,  treating it in the usual   cargo  cult style ( multiply the number of  passengers - 1400 - by an  average  expenditure of  $370 each , lucrative,  yippee! ) .

Few  cruise ships have called  in since the opening of the terminal  in 2013   at which  the  then  Defence Minister Senator  David Johnson , later torpedoed , said the Quayside upgrade  was designed to  expand the  cruise ship  market  and  the professional  capabilities  of Defence. No mention  made  of  cattleboats  and  canoes .   Furthermore ,  it  was revealed  soon after  that  Townsville  cannot handle  bigger P. & O.  cruise ships.

On the other hand, 15 live  export boats  have passed through the Port of Townsville  this year  up  to  February  17, close to 300,000 head exported  through  the  port   last  year, up there with Darwin  which  shipped  487,000 -140,000 of them trucked across from Queensland -  and talk of  a record  600,000  this year  in the Top End .

As most people know,  live export of livestock is a contentious  issue across the nation .   In  Townsville, with 580 unemployed  meatworkers,  much  of   the  coverage in the Townsville Bulletin  tends to  be in the  form  of  lengthy  letters  from  people   for  and  against .

 Soon after the Amsterdam  arrived  , another  stock carrier ,  the Philippines registered  Sahiwali  Express  , above ,  tied up at  berth 10 .  It  used to be named  Lis E , listed on the anti live  export  website  with  the  following   masthead ...
 

It shows a surprising number of  vessels involved in the  livestock trade have  changed names  and  lists  companies and people  involved in the business , including   sheep  exports  from a Holmes a Court  property in Western Australia.

 

Incidentally,  Townsville's   Quayside  Terminal   is promoted as  a new and exciting  venue   for weddings , conventions , exhibitions , conferences  and  dinners.   A website  for making  Quayside bookings  answers   questions any person intent on using the  building  may ask, such as :"Will any cruise ship  be using  the Quayside terminal  during  my  event ?"

 

The reassuring answer  says  that occasion  cannot arise because the terminal is only available  for hire  when "cruise ships  and Defence  are not using the   venue."  Defence ?  The last thing  you want  at a  wedding reception ,one would think , is a  bunch of  thirsty  , jolly  Jack Tars , Australian and American , tying up   and  coming  aboard  to  kiss the bride  and dance the  bridesmaids offa their feet.

 

However, a signal just  received indicates Townsville is to become  a busy naval port, the RAN's newest and largest warship, HMAS Adelaide, to make its first visit to the  port any day soon, part of  an  $83million   cargo  cult plan  spread over  30  years !

With increasing numbers of livestock  being exported from  Townsville and Darwin there are  complaints  that   jobs are  being lost ,  abattoirs  are finding it hard to   find enough  stock to  operate , the new  Darwin meatworks placed under pressure . There  is talk of a   possible new  Chinese  abattoir   opening  at  Hughenden  sending  direct to China through Townsville. Meat processed in Townsville is trucked to  Brisbane and   also  shipped to Asian markets through Townsville . 

The Australian Meat Industry Employees Union has expressed concern about the live export  trade , saying the Townsville  abattoir  at Stuart  had not yet been able to open in 2016. The union   discussed the situation  in Brisbane  with  the  Employment Minister  Grace Grace and the  three   Townsville state Labor  members of  parliament;  there has been a call  for a  cap on  live exports  from  North Australia .

Due to so much livestock being exported overseas , the price of  meat has  jumped  in  shops  and today on an  ABC  rural report Deputy Prime Minister and Minister for Agriculture    Barnaby   Joyce  came in for criticism  over the situation . There is a  growing  feeling  that  Australia's food security and  jobs  are  being jeopardised  as overseas  countries rush to  shore up their  supplies with   live  imports  from  Australia , while also buying up  pastoral and agricultural    properties .

EXCLUSIVE : ISLAND CELEBRITY TURNS PIRATE AND RUM RUNNER

After  a  lengthy period  cruising  the  Great  Barrier  Reef seeking  ships carrying   barrels  of ready  mixed    Margaritas to  raid   ,  Larry the  cussing   Lorikeet  and   freelance  pirate  has  come ashore   at  Magnetic Island and  is once  more  receiving R and R  at the residence of  the  Queen of  the Jungle .

 

To  show his appreciation for  looking after  his  assorted  teddy bears while he was  away on  the bounding  main ,   he   presented  the  Queen  with  the above  bottle of  his  own  Captain  Larry special  rum , soon to be released on the unsuspecting,  thirsty Queensland   market ,  and a painted  coconut  portrait of  himself   leading   the  life  of  Captain Jack  Sparrow and  Jimmy Buffett .

Both the rum  label, showing him in a  pirate  pose,  and   portrait were  painted  by artist  Jenn  Payne,  dubbed Australia's Number One Parrot Head by Buffett  , who is taught the  finer  points of  sailing    and   navigation  by Captain Larry  aboard the 43ft  catamaran Nyeki  in  hostile  waters, dodging  Customs and Border Security vessels .   Since  his arrival back on  the island,  he has received  numerous offers  to  endorse products, including low-cal  mayonnaise,  and   leading pirate  roles in  Hollywood  and  Bollywood movies.

 

Bollywood is out  because of  an injury he suffered in Cyclone Larry  which  makes him  walk  like  Caribbean   pirate   Captain   Morgan  with  a touch of gout  and would limit his involvement in all  those  energetic  Indian  dance routines.  Captain Larry rum  is expected to  scuttle  Captain Morgan's  spiced  rum  which  contains vanilla , cinnamon and  cardamom .

Captain Larry  refuses to reveal the ingredients in his  potent  drop ; he does, however, like yoghurt  with a splash of  coffee and a  side serving of Vita Brits . He  also  finds   German  toffee  tasty and , with an eye for a  well turned ankle,  whistles madly  every  time  he sees  Chancellor  Angela  Merkel  on  television.

HAIR TODAY-GONE TOMORROW DURING YEAR OF THE MONKEY

Closely knit , hair freshly  brushed,  eyebrows  plucked , latest Coalition team, hanging on for dear life, pose  for  media at  Government House  after  swearing  in  ceremony.

This being an election  year, it is desirable the Federal government present a united, nimble, agile , mature , can-do image. However , it has been noticed that PM Malcolm Turnbull's  thin locks  have  become  grandfatherly  white  since scalping  Tony  Abbott.

Some attribute this to  Malcolm's concern over   ministers  falling like autumn leaves, the outbreak of bedwetting  over   GST, Treasurer Scott Morrison becoming  a liability  like Joe Hockey, Christopher  Pyne's  frequent  TV appearances , the  end  of  the passionate  honeymoon during which he was bitten by  mosquitoes  while  touring  the  outback  and Townsville in an open topped jalopy .

Bazza  McKenzie  or Barnaby Joyce ? Age Photo .

And having Barbaby Joyce as Deputy PM , he of noticeably receding hairline,   could  be justification for  Malcolm to tear out his thatch  and  ask for a hair of the dog  instead  of a healthy Continental breakfast  with Lucy in  The  Lodge. It is even whispered in the corridors of power that the PM will adopt the Andrew Peacock  remedy for grey hair  by becoming, according to dark bearded  veteran  political reporter , Mungo MacCallum, prematurely black .

While on the subject of  hair, the  Australian Financial Review  scribe  Joe Aston   has described  dumped   Defence Minister  Kevin Andrews , as  " the blue-black man- dyed Member for  Menzies ". You  don't get  well  shampooed  lines like this out of  a  bottle .

Aston said Andrews had squealed like  a labouring heifer bogged in a swamp  trying to keep  the defence  portfolio. ( On the other hand , this could have been  due to the  castration ring the   feisty female Speaker  of the  Northern Territory Legislative Assembly  threatened  to  use  on  Andrews.)

Continuing with  the   coiffure line,  Aston wrote the  cutting remark : Now Abbott and Andrews both fly around addressing American think tanks on how to keep  the grey out of your hair...

Just the other day, a  North  Queensland   Tory pollie who  makes his Liberal   colleagues  in Canberra  wince because of his antics  , was   seen   browsing around  the   hair accessories  stand  in a  chemist  shop.  Is this an  indication that he will sport  a beaded headband  or a fascinator  the next time he is in Canberra ?

MYSTERY OVERSEAS CANDIDATE FOR NEW TERRITORY PARTY

An  intriguing  story going about  Darwin  is that  the new 1Territory Party , lining up potential candidates  for  all  Territory seats  and  the House of Representatives, could have an overseas  person  interested  in  throwing his hat into the ring . An overseas person-who could that be ? Surely not  the  former  CLP Leader , Terry  Mills , who led the party to victory,  was  voted out  a short time  later  by  his colleagues while in Japan  on  a trade drive in February  2014?

Mills eventually resigned from parliament  saying he did not want to start a  blood feud like Rudd and Gillard.  A fine sentiment ,  but the CLP has been  marked by    seemingly   constant blood letting  ever since, with a  farcical failed attempt to topple  Chief Minister  Adam Giles , a failed attempt to remove the Speaker ,  a  bagful of  other shenanigans , the latest engulfing the Deputy Chief Minister, Willem Westra van Holthe , involving  a Vietnamese   company, a Top End dragon fruit  farm , shares , travel , a  saga  strangely  headed  AMISS SAIGON? (  sounds like a  familiar  musical, wonder why ? )  in the Northern Territory News  of  February 10.  Incidentally , it was Willem who broke  the  news  to Mills  over  the  phone  that  he had been  sacked as Chief  Minister .

Off  to Indonesia  went Mills  as   the  Territory's  Trade  Commissioner . However , the NT Government  sacked  him in February 2015 , the   Darwin based  Indonesian Consul  commenting that  his removal would  damage the Territory's image  in  his country.

 

Mills is still deeply involved in Indonesia  through the  Australian Indonesian Institute Board , its main project  the Australian Indonesian Youth Exchange  and recently posted  photos from  the front of  Starbucks  in Jakarta, bombed by  terrorists.  So, is  Mills the overseas mystery man ?  Only time will tell .

DRINKS ON THE HOUSE : UNUSUAL LINK WITH FAMOUS PUB WITH NO BEER SONG FOUND IN NORTH QUEENSLAND CHURCH

A great find  at  a   Townsville church  fete was  this  unusual  book  of  poetry   with an insert  marking  the 1977  death  of  Dan  Sheahan , 95 , an Irishman   responsible for  penning  a poem  which  was   converted into one of   Australia's best known songs , The Pub With  No Beer,  sung  by  the  late  Slim Dusty.

 

Called  Songs  from the  Canefields , the  worn  1973 reprint , signed  by Sheahan , contains  a  religious , fold  out  thank you  card  from his family  for condolences  expressed  on  Dan's death  and  includes  the  poem  entitled  The Pub  Without   Beer .

It is said County Cork born cane farmer  Sheahan  went to the Day Dawn Hotel , Ingham, North Queensland, in 1943, but  the pub had run out of beer  because  American servicemen had  drunk it  dry  the night  before. The story goes that Dan sat down with a glass of wine  and  penned A Pub Without Beer , run in the North Queensland Register in early 1944. It had six line verses , unlike the subsequent popular song of four line verses.

As part of the  1988 Australian Bicentennial , this  plaque was unveiled by Sheahan's eldest son, Shaun,   to commemorate his father , "the poet from the pocket"  and   the long  gone Day Dawn Hotel , now  Lee's Hotel Motel, were  the  poem was written. 

The poems in the collection  form a kind of autobiography spanning 95 years, tracing his time in Ireland before  coming to Australia , serving in World War l, the fall of Singapore, the death of a Digger, cane cutting , a beer strike in Tully,  Bulimba beer  and  Bundy Rum  , politicians , even  baking a bun. A great , refreshing  read .  

 

Also bought at the blessed  fete, possibly from the collection of the person who owned the  Sheahan book,   was the Slim Dusty and Joy McKean book , Another Day, Another Town  SLIM DUSTY , in which  Dan Sheahan  and  the story  behind   the eventual  1957  recording of  The Pub  With No  Beer , which became  a  big seller overseas  as  well  as Australia , is  covered.

 

Knock  about country music  performer Gordon Parsons first picked up  a few verses about a pub with no beer when he was a sleeper cutter in the NSW north coast.  It appealed to his sense of  humour  and occasionally  he  sang  bits and  pieces about  a dry pub while touring in Queensland, without making much impression on  the audiences.

 

After   an evening on   whisky  with   toothy singer   Chad Morgan   in 1956,  he  told Slim he  had  finished that  sung ,  the words of which Chad , who is still performing today, had  written down . What song ? The one about the pub with no beer.    Slim  heard it for the first time  and  asked  if he could  record it . The rest is history.

 

Later , while touring  North Queensland , Slim Dusty  arrived in Ingham and was surprised when  he was told that the family of the man  who wrote  the pub with no foaming fluid -not Gordon Parsons - was outside...

The book covers that meeting with the  family; Slim  wrote  the North Queensland Register was read widely in rural Queensland and down as far as the NSW border. At the time , many   bush workers  learned poetry by heart and recited it at gatherings.

Gordon could have seen  the first two verses of Sheahan's poem , or heard them recited  like  folklore. There was little or no similarity after the  first  two verses of each version . It made Slim " mad "  for anyone to insinuate  that Gordon  had pinched  the  pub  from  Dan  Sheahan .

Dan , who spoke in a rich Irish brogue, did not want money, but said he would like the credit for the song. Slim  set to music  and recorded other verses  of Dan's  such as  When You're Short of a Smoke  and The Last of the Valley Mail .

 

* The cover illustration  on the book of poems shows Dan  relaxed, sinking a cold one  , holding the North Queensland Register  in which his pub poem had been run. It is the same paper in which journalist, historian  and  publisher Glenville Pike wrote a  column for  many  years .  With financial backing from Darwin journalist and author Jessie Litchfield,  Pike also launched and edited the North Australian Monthly in the l950s  , printed in Townsville , which included poetry, some by  his  mother .

BRAVE CHINESE ARTIST TELLS AUSTRALIA SOME HOME TRUTHS

Gutsy   Chinese  artist,  Ai Weiwei,  a soul brother of  Julian Assange ,  included  a special  tribute  to  Australian   activists , above , in  his joint   Melbourne  exhibition  with  works  of  the  late  Andy Warhol .

It  is   a  room in  which  portraits  of  the activists  are   made out of Lego pieces which  the  chicken- hearted / buck   hungry  company   at    first   did   not want to  supply  for  fear of  offending  China .    

Those  featured  included  Assange , visited by Weiwei  in  the  Ecuadorian Embassy in London last year , the  two  photographed  giving the  finger to  world  tyrants  and suppressors  of   vital  information, freedom of  speech .  Weiwei specifically praised  Wikileaks founder Assange   , saying he was an Australian  human rights activist  speaking out  for openness and transparency.Watching authorities was  more important  than ever in  the information age .

 " We have the right to know all those powers, the structure, how they function, why they don't want to let people know, that's really very important. He (Assange )does play a very important role and he's still paying, or sacrifices  his life  because he  made that  choice,"the artist  is reported as saying .

Visible in the top photograph is the portrait  of journalist/author Jill Jolliffe , well known  in Darwin , for her involvement in  covering the East Timor  conflict , helping  the  populace after the  conflict . Her 2001 book covered the Indonesian murder of  the  Australian TV   team  known as  the Balibo  5.

 

She  selflessly exposed the  massacre  right  nextdoor to  Australia  which  went on for  almost   a quarter of  a century while we, the US included , and  Oz  willingly, eagerly  signed  up with Indonesia  to  plunder   the  invaded  country's  oil  reserves .

It is  probably fair  to say , Jolliffe   suffered    financially and emotionally for  her  long  involvement  in  the  struggle . Another   shown  here  is  the  president   of  the  Australian Human  Rights  Commission,  Professor  Gillian Triggs , monstered  and vilified  by   the   Abbott   Government  for  doing  her  job , still  snubbed   by  the  Turnbull  crew .

 Longtime  Northern  Territory campaigner , Rosemary Kunoth-Monks , is there  along with   Geoffrey Robertson QC,  journalist Peter Greste, Rosie Batty,  Michael Kirby AC CMG, Archie Roach, Julian Burnside AO QC ,Gary Foley. 

  

Others are from the fields of international law and academia, social welfare, media, community activism in support of indigenous people, asylum seekers, sex workers and the gender non-specific.

 

In a  short  TV interview  with Weiwei , he said that if Australia wanted to have a close association with  China, presumably through  a trade agreement, it should also  tell  it  what  it  was  doing wrong , like  a  friend .

 

In other words , speak out about the obvious human rights  oppression  in China , the latest example of  thuggery being the  bashing of  people connected with a Hong Kong  bookshop  and  the  disappearance of relatives  on  the mainland .

 

During his time in  China  Ai  underwent  an operation   in Germany after having   been   bashed  about the head while exposing corruption   in his homeland involving  jerry built  school  buildings which collapsed in Sichuan  province during an earthquake claiming the lives of many children  ; was  arrested  and held without charge for 81  days in   a secret  prison;  kept  in a tiny room with bright lights , watched by guards ; accused of economic crimes; had his studio  destroyed ; people connected with him disappeared ; his passport was  taken away . A massive global protest  resulted in him being allowed to  leave the country .

YEAR OF THE FLUNKEY

When it comes to unusual and catchy names for hairdressing salons and trendy restaurants , Australia seems  to be way ahead of the rest of the world . Latest gossip in Canberra , with so many things to jawbone  about , is the  claim that  a new eatery called  the  GONGED  OUT  FAT  CHOY FLUNKEY  is to open its ornate  doors . Obviously a play on the Chinese New Year incantation, it will cater  for  those  who  like   sipping   short  soup  through  a straw  or  run about like  the  rabbit  in Alice  in Wonderland . Flunkeys  galore , lovers of puns ,  are expected  to  gather there  and   discuss  invitations  and  travel   plans  to  exotic  places .