MURUROA ATOLL : Coalition leader Tony Abbott today announced that a nuclear bomb testing range like the French one here will be built on the rejected Angela-Pamela uranium mine site south of Alice Springs , if his Split Enz Party seizes power.
Wearing a beret and riding a contaminated rissole delivery trike used in the many French nuclear bomb tests which showered the Pacific with fallout, “ call me Antoine ” Abbott, said the tests had caused an economic boom in French Tahiti . Strontium 90 fallout from the tests had ended up in milk and caused Australian babies to glow in the dark, making it easier for parents to find their infants in power blackouts, especially in Darwin.
Similar tests south of Alice, he predicted, would cause a double digit spurt in the Centre’s desert mirage industry and lead to a new breed of mutated camel, built like greyhounds, which would break all records at the Camel Cup. Abbott flayed the Henderson government for pulling the pin on the Angela-Pamela project . When it was pointed out his Northern Territory love children ,the Country Liberals, had also given the thumbs down on the venture, he responded with a typical Gallic oath, usually used when the French describe the British.
Centralians , he said, had nothing to fear from a nuclear bomb testing range- if they regularly ate homogenised peanut butter sandwiches. The famous film star Mickey Rooney proved this when he stumbled into a nuclear testing range during count down and ate an homogenised peanut butter sandwich just as the township was nuked. Apart from sounding like one of the singing chipmunks for a month , he survived , went on to have amazing luck with the pokies at Las Vegas and had to beat off admiring women with a big glowing stick which looked like Darth Vader’s light sabre. Rooney married 26 times and was finally buried in a lead lined coffin
Wearing a beret and riding a contaminated rissole delivery trike used in the many French nuclear bomb tests which showered the Pacific with fallout, “ call me Antoine ” Abbott, said the tests had caused an economic boom in French Tahiti . Strontium 90 fallout from the tests had ended up in milk and caused Australian babies to glow in the dark, making it easier for parents to find their infants in power blackouts, especially in Darwin.
Similar tests south of Alice, he predicted, would cause a double digit spurt in the Centre’s desert mirage industry and lead to a new breed of mutated camel, built like greyhounds, which would break all records at the Camel Cup. Abbott flayed the Henderson government for pulling the pin on the Angela-Pamela project . When it was pointed out his Northern Territory love children ,the Country Liberals, had also given the thumbs down on the venture, he responded with a typical Gallic oath, usually used when the French describe the British.
Centralians , he said, had nothing to fear from a nuclear bomb testing range- if they regularly ate homogenised peanut butter sandwiches. The famous film star Mickey Rooney proved this when he stumbled into a nuclear testing range during count down and ate an homogenised peanut butter sandwich just as the township was nuked. Apart from sounding like one of the singing chipmunks for a month , he survived , went on to have amazing luck with the pokies at Las Vegas and had to beat off admiring women with a big glowing stick which looked like Darth Vader’s light sabre. Rooney married 26 times and was finally buried in a lead lined coffin
