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| Nasty flockers |
SYDNEY : Colonial history seems about to be repeated as ruthless Liberal Party faction leaders , known as the Rum Corps , two evil looking members right , are already holding emergency secret talks to decide the fate of Malcolm Bligh Turnbull . According to a scurvy informant in a Parramatta wayside inn , the Rum Corps plans to storm Kirribilli House during the night and drag the PM out from under his bed like Captain William Bligh when he was governor of the NSW penal colony from 1806-1808. Then the lacklustre PM , with all his possessions loaded aboard a fleet of leaky Manly ferries , will be pushed off in the direction of the Caribbean with a one way ticket , while the power mad Rum Corps gets drunk on the trendy new grog made from crushed Northern Territory green ants .
In recent weeks the PM has been showing signs that he knows his troops are plotting against him , yet he adopted a brave stance , like a true blue naval captain on a burning deck . He projected the image of Captain Bountiful , a famous old , toothless seadog , with one leg , one arm , one testicle , one pet parrot and Lady Hamilton's vital statistics tattooed on his much nibbled seabiscuit , who fought alongside Lord Nelson at the historic Battle of Brexit where the Froggies had their smelly cheese caskets riddled with best British grapeshot .
