HOLLYWOOD : Major film studios are
clamouring to sign up PM Tony
Abbott as the star in a series of
slapstick movies . His fame as an international laughing stock , especially after his St. Patrick’s Day clangers,
has made him hot property
in Tinsel Town.
Sydney barrister Charles Waterstreet, writing in brisbanetimes.com.au , said Abbott’s verbal skills were celebrated worldwide. On bustle.com., Kim Nilsson had
written that Abbott
was doing a Rob Ford , the
hapless coke-addicted boofhead, former mayor of Toronto , without the crack, or
humour . Abbott was painted
by Nilsson as
both Abbott and Costello clowns with his
utterances on climate change –“absolute crap”-and other subjects . Making The Duke of Edinburgh, aka Phil the Greek , an Aussie knight still has many people rolling in the aisles ,see skit top of post .
Universal Pictures chief , Fred Fractured-Flickers, today told
Little Darwin there is a golden future for Tony Abbott on the silver screen . Being able to play the part of
two clowns for the cost of one was
most attractive to producers
of B grade movies. He could be bigger than the Three Stooges
all rolled into one. If the
Foreign Minister , Julie Bishop, the Speaker
of the House of Representatives , Bronwyn Bishop , and Health
Minister Sussan Ley , billed as the Down Under Singing Koalas , could be induced to join the prime minister in a film career , they would become superstars , he predicted , ashing his Cuban cigar on
an unpaid intern .
He envisaged a modern version of the great Universal WWll movie , In the
Navy, starring Bud Abbott , Lou Costello and the
Andrews Sisters, in which the Australian politicians would play all
the main
parts. The screenplay could be changed to involve Bud Abbott / Lou Costello (Tony)
in charge of a leaky Australian built
warship chasing an Adelaide built Japanese
submarine whose captain
is the first woman in the Japanese Navy ,
possibly played by a former
Australian politician , Sophie
Mirabella . An alternative to Mirabelle
, he said , could be ex pollie ,
Amanda Vanstone, who now wears night vision binoculars , but she may have
difficulty getting down the conning tower of a midget sub .
Incidently, Fractured-Flickers pointed out that the words
for the Gimme Some Skin, My Friend
song in the original movie
would be dear to the heart of Prime Minister Abbott ... “ You like my style
. You like my smile. Well why don’t you
make me know it . You like my walk. You like my talk . Well there’s only one way
to show it ...vote early and often at the next spill . ”
