FBI AND LONE RANGER JOIN FORCES FOR WHITE HOUSE RAID

 Latest  exclusive  non-fake news  report

WASHINGTON : With the help  of  the Lone Ranger and  his   pal ,  Tonto , the FBI   is planning to raid  the White House and   seize   vital documents linking President   Trump with  a  Russian go-go dancer  .  There is  a   precedent   for this  unusual  combined action  going back to   1968   when  the then FBI chief-J. Edgar  Hoover- called in  the Lone  Ranger  for  help. 

The   photograph  capturing the historic event  appeared in the popular  American magazine , Esquire , a  copy of which was  bought in the Fannie Bay , Darwin , Vinnies  shop ,  and is show  below . 

 Not to look conspicuous , the Lone Ranger (Brace Beemer )  wore a business  suit  and  a mask; he  was armed  with what  appears to  have  been a  hockey stick , an alpine horn or an early phone tapping device . The observation was made that in those days  the Lone Ranger was  such  a   big guy his mount , named  Nickel Silver, was  a  powerful  draughthorse , not   an  Arab   racehorse .

According to  an FBI leak ,   the  impending   raid on the White House with a  descendant  of the  Lone Ranger will not include a  horse  because it might eat  Donald's  fake   hair  , become windy  and  have  to  be  put down by  a  Democrat vet .

Esquire  magazine  ran a  "happiness  sweepstake "  in  which the winner would receive a  host of  prizes,  including  a  glossy photograph of  Hoover and the Lone Ranger, two  plastic daffodils , a large oil painting , a  free  lunch in  New York , threatening  telegrams   from one  David Merrick , copies of  original letters  complaining of editorial malfeasance   from such writers as   Norman Mailer, Philip Roth , John Updike and others, a French hard to understand letter from General de Gaulle's  office ,  books  and  records.  All entries   had to be addressed to the Esquire  "Happiness Department ", 488 Madison Avenue , New York .