Our Shipping Reporter , the only one north of the Coogee Aquarium in which a shark coughed up a human arm , this morning reluctantly informed us that former Queensland Liberal Party leader , Sir Thomas Alfred Hiley , is experiencing more indignities.
The waterfront roundsman recently exclusively reported that Sir Thomas , a former Queensland Treasurer , is mouldering away in bushes on the Magnetic Island foreshore-full of water...actually a lifeboat off a dredge named after him .
When the sympathetic Shipping Reporter called on Sir Thomas to see if he had been baled out by the party faithful , he discovered a truly distressing scene . While there appeared to be less water in the bilge , visible was part of a what appeared to be the workings of a toilet cistern !!!The object which could have shocked maiden aunts, thankfully, had vanished , probably souvenired by an unwashed backpacker .
And TADPOLES !!!. Yep , tadpoles , possibly cane toads , sunning themselves in the shallows . This surely is the last thing Sir Thomas would want to see in his water, holding his own and fine tuning the state's rubbery budget , while smoking a Cuban cigar . Another of Sir Thomas's specimen slides from the Townsville University Hospital's true blue rare casebook follows.
