LONDON : In a surprise announcement, the Queen today said that the ferocious Australian Coalition leader , Tony Abbott, has been signed up for a part in a new Dr Who series. Little Darwin understands he will play a malevolent Darlek , shouting , "EXTERMINATE! EXTERMINATE ! EXTERMINATE !" Dr Who talent scouts say Abbott looks and sounds like a real Darlek as he dashes about Australia and now in London attempting to wipe out all profligate Labor governments.Geriatric Darleks throughout the world , sitting on the boards of many top companies, are thrilled by the news that Abbott will be the first Rhodes Scholar to play one of them .
Some other members of the Australian Tory shadow ministry are also being considered for Darlek parts in the new thrilling series. One conservative , however , is too big to fit inside a Darlek killing machine and may have to be content with a role as a stand in for Shrek .
Little Darwin was told Abbott put off a secret voyage in a midget submarine to the troops in Afghanistan to be auditioned for the leading evil Darlek in the Dr Who extravaganza .
