Wednesday, December 25, 2024

SANTA DECLARES WAR ON TRUMP

 Santa  Claus  is  furious over  the  way  Donald Trump's  dodgy  slogan to  Make  America Great Again has  been  converted to sell a  range of  clothing- including sweatshirts- displaying the message Make Christmas Great  Again.   

Father Christmas is reportedly angrier  over the latest  crass  commercialising of  Christmas inspired  by  Trump   than  Clark Griswold was  in  National  Lampoon's  Christmas  Vacation film  when he received the news there  would  be  no   Christmas  bonus .

"Christmas is already  great - there  is nothing  wrong with it !"he shouted  when  interviewed  by  our award winning  Santaland  correspondent , Argus Tuft .

Santa  revealed  he  intends launching a massive  Make  America  Sane  Again   campaign  to  counter   the   impact  of  Trump and all the other  undermining   influences  in  the  US of  A .

He  blames  Trump , Fox News  , the Kardashians ,  conspiracy  weirdos , Russian  involvement in the  presidential  election campaign  and  clumsy drug  in  the  drinking  water   for  what   he  says   has  reduced   a  once  mighty  nation  into  a  cross between   Bedlam  and  a  three- ring  circus .

He is particularly concerned  by  Trump's appointee to  head the FBI-Kash Patel - a  strong critic of the  vital organisation , who  plans sackings and  turning  it  into  what could  be  an  extension of  Disney Land .

When  Santa   was a  young boy , he  proudly wore the  Junior G-Man  badge , below,   he  got  in  a  Christmas  stocking ,  and  is shocked to think  the FBI , which has  guided him  safely  through  life  and long, dangerous Chrissy  present  delivery  flights , with the help of its  agent , disguised as a  red-nosed reindeer , is  going  to  be  dismantled .

Vengeful Santa  is training  his  loyal , hard working , underpaid   elves, chanting  Merry Christmas,  to  bombard  Donald  Trump and  his    odd   bunch  of  appointees  to  high  office  with  sponge cakes  at  the  Washington   inauguration . 

(Santa,Trump, Lampoon.)