Saturday, July 30, 2011

MOCK CROCK IN CROC SHOCK

Several of Darwin’s polluted beaches-including Mindil- are being searched for a missing politician taken by a savage feral suet pudding - rejected and flushed down the toilet during judging of cakes by the CWA at the recent Darwin Show .


According to Darwin’s most respected newspaper,The Cullen Bay Cock-Up, the as yet unnamed politician, believed to be a senator , was wearing Siberian Little Whimbrel smugglers and handcuffs when he ventured into the murky mire and was grabbed by the pud .


A visiting Good Samaritan , Julia Ranger, sipping carbonated water, was walking her pet crocodile on the beach and rushed to help the struggling pollie . So desperate was he, the man offered Julia his autographed album of Barnaby Joyce in 57 farcical chartered accountant poses if she saved him from the heartless suet monster.

Unfortunately for the hysterical senator , Ranger’s randy crocodile , Vim, tried to mate with the comely suet pudding and the screaming man was last seen caught up in an otherwise passionate Mills and Boon ending being towed towards Timor–Leste , a flustered Cupid trying to get a clear shot with his bow and arrow on the two enthusiastic lovers , engaged in a series of lusty rolls ,which would surely win a gold medal for Australia in the aquatic dancing section at the forthcoming British Olympics.