Friday, October 22, 2010

BOLLOCKS TO YOU, JOHN HEWSON !

In a special shock horror Halloween edition , the Australian Women's Weekly will run a tasteful centrespread proving that our former great treasurer, Peter Costello, does have intestinal fortitude. The nation was shocked to hear the claim by famous egg catcher and mud cake tax expert, John Hewson, that Costello failed to give John Howard the boot because he "had no balls." The outrageous claim that Costello was lacking in fishing tackle made his official call for fecund females to go forth and multiply, having one for Pete and one for the government,well, non core or blank .


The Women's Weekly picture spread, in 3D, will disprove this hurtful statement . Little Darwin has been leaked a full frontal snap from the magazine which shows Costello in a manly,elitist pose , nose uptilted, wearing a tattered pair of Tony Abbott's cast off, moth-eaten budgie smugglers,which leaves nothing to the imagination. The technicolour vitals resemble an unfortunate , squashed Tasmanian possum after a Gunns woodchipping gang has been through an old growth forest.


Hurtful Hewson will have egg on his face when he sees the pix, and will undoubtedly laugh all the way to the next Gruen Transfer . Readers may recall that jovial Hewson once accused Little Johnny of kicking the Kirribilli House cat , resulting in letters of outrage from feline owners, people burning their green and gold tracksuits and a slump in the sale of Akubra hats.