CAIRNS CASTS ANOTHER SPELL

Photographs by  Aeronautical Correspondent , Abra .

DIRTY LINEN AIRED BY SCOMO ABOARD TEREDO NAVALIS RIDDLED SINKING SHIP

 

ADAM AND EVE WASHED UP

Our Shipping  Reporter took  this  snap and  is not sure if  he  once  read  in  a brilliant  piece of  American  writing  or  heard  it stated in  a  movie   that  poached   eggs  on   toast  was   described  as   Adam  and   Eve  on   a  raft . 

 

HOME ALONE WITH A HUNGRY COCKY, A KOOKABURRA AND A SLUGGISH COBRA

 

Another odd  series  by  Vallis  who  plans to  jump start  beaut  op shop  Cobra  with  batteries. 

MURDOCH OMNIBUS FUELED BY HARVEY

 In what seemed like  a  steal  from the  1950 comedy-drama  film, Harvey , about a  giant invisible  rabbit  of  that  name,  nose-twitching  Sky Television  presenter  Paul  Murray  recently informed   scorched   residents  of  fire- ravaged   Kangaroo Island , off  Adelaide,  his   trip  there   had  been  financed  by  Harvey ( Norman ) .  Indeed  ,  he   went  on  to  effusively  praise  Harvey  Norman .

Harvey Norman , he   told  the  gathering ,  was   financing  all  of  his  trips about  the  country  in  search  of   real   people , who  seem  to  gather  on   licenced    premises ,  like   thirsty  rabbits   about  an  almost  dry waterhole  in  a  drought  when  the  Sky  Circus rolls  into  town . 

The entertaining  movie  Harvey  featured James Stewart, an amiable  but eccentric bloke named  Elwood  P. (Paul?) Dowd,  convinced  he  had a     giant  white   rabbit  named  Harvey, 6ft. 3/1/2 inches tall. 

Elwood's  friends  looked  askance  when  he  introduced  them  to  Harvey , no  hide  nor hair  or  droppings  visible . 

The   two  got  about  drinking  in  various bars , just as  Paul Murray  does in  his search  for  so called  real  people .  Murray  thought  Donald  Trump  was  a  great  guy  instead  of   obviouly   being  as  mad  as  a  March  Hare.  

Words of  wisdom uttered by armchair general and  polisher  Murray  include  his  statement that the senior American military official  who personally   contacted  China , advising  them  they were not going to be nuked during the  last  mad  days of  Trump's  reign , should  be   sacked  for  an  act  of   treason.

 In  Murdoch  regional  newspapers   Harvey Norman   appears  larger  than  King  Kong , its extensive  advertisements   causing    readers  to  complain  papers  have become  HN  catalogues, hard to find the news , contributing to their demise . The Townsville  Bulletin, Cairns  Post ,  NT News  are   stuffed   with  HN  .

Inserting all  those adverts makes  it  hard  to find  space for real news in a  prominent  position .  We  recently pointed out  that a story about  three people having  been  bitten by  snakes in the  Townsville region  was tucked away at  the bottom of  a  page  way  back in  The Bulletin .    

Whoever is  in  control  of  the steering wheel  at the  Townsville Bulletin needs to  drive  the  rickety media  model   into  the V8  pits  for  a   major   overhaul , the   wheels  coming  adrift . On  April 22  , across three columns on P18  , there  was a  story by  Dom Tripolone ,  about  car  buyers  having to  wait a  long  time for  the delivery of  new cars .   Surprise,  surprise . On  P 34 , the  same  article , by  the  same reporter, in  greater  detail , headed   New car  buyers  remain  stalled .    

TOWNSVILLE'S JEWEL IN THE CROWN UNDER REPAIR ; PUBLIC WARNED

Part of  the extensive work being carried out on the  Magnetic Island  passenger   ferry   terminal  ramp. Not  far away , signs  were  placed  at either end of  a  major  public  footpath  leading  to   and  from  the  terminal,  serving  the  marina as well ,  warning  it  had  been  closed  due to  safety concerns .

This  situation seems to have escaped the attention of  the  Townsville media  which our  Shipping  Reporter, who took these photos,  has  oft  said  treats  Maggie as if  it  is  actually  the   Lost  City of  Atlantis , hidden  beneath  the  sea  in some  far  off   location. Bollards and  tape have  blocked off  an area of  the  path  which   appears  to  have  been   flooded   by  rainwater  seepage from   the  adjoining  Blue  on  Blue Peppers  resort.  

POP UP EXPLOSION

 As a result of the  recent  torrential  rain in  North  Queensland  fungi is  appearing in  large  amounts and  shapes  out in the bush, along  tracks  and  on  the  exposed  gnarled  roots   of   trees.

A  rotting banana  trunk , above ,  left on  the ground  by the Queen of the Jungle   so  that  Curlews could  feast on insects  attracted  to  it ,  has   burst   into   white   clusters  of   fungi  after  the deluge .

A grassy location   has  taken on  the  appearance of  a  field of   mushrooms  from  tiny  ones  hard  to see  to  some  plate sized .  

Another  attractive crop  was spotted , below, spreading    along   the  roots of  a   tree   

NORWEGIAN TOKYO ROSE AND KYOWA ROSE STEAM INTO SLEEPY QUEENSLAND MEDIA PORT UNNOTICED

Flying  Norway flag, general cargo vessel Star Japan..

                   

Marshall  Islands  registered  cargo vessel  Kyowa  Rose, above ,in Townsville . Photos  by  the  flag-draped Shipping  Reporter .

 

CAIRNS AFTER THE BIG WET

 

Abra photographs .

PM TURNS CHICKEN !!!!!!

 

In yet another indignity for  Magnetic  Island's mutilated  mystery  mermaid  , the   apparent   head of   Prime Minister  Scott Morrison,  placed  atop  its  decapitated  and armless   body , has  been  twisted out  of  shape by  heavy rain and  he  now   looks   like  a  rooster , above,  about  to  get  the  chop  and  be  made  into a  feather duster 

Left- leaning  Scomo  in situ , above,  before  being  lashed by  torrential    rain  that  has  turned  him  into a    new  look  PM who resembles  a refugee from  a  Kentucky  Fried Chicken  processing  plant. 

An island resident with a  vivid imagination   said  the  latest distorted  mug shot  reminds  him  of  the  fable about  the  barmy chook  which ran  about  the  barnyard  warning  everybody  the  sky would fall  in  if  they  voted  in an   ALP government .

 The  PM   flew  into Townsville this  week  with a  large media flock   and  not  one of  the scribes   picked  up  the  fact  that   his   head  is  on  top  of  the remains  of  a  badly  treated  fibreglass  mermaid  , whose appearance  and   gradual dismemberment  hardly  rated  a   mentioned  in  the  mainland media . ( Attention News  Editors : This  is  not  fake  news ) .

A CACOPHONY OF COCKATOOS

 

Vallis photos.

AN END TO BEAUTIFUL THINGS

 

Battered , foxed , spine  cover  torn  away and  soiled,  the  above  book, found in a North Queensland dump shop, was published  in  London , November 1939 ,  soon   after  the  outbreak  of   WWll.

The wide ranging  contents , profusely illustrated,  chosen from the life and literature of the world by  Arthur Mee, editor of the Children's Newspaper,  was  first  published in  1925 ;  it  was reprinted  each  year  up  until 1932, again in   l934,  in 1936 , with  a gap  until  fateful  1939, not  followed by  beautiful  things . 

Strangely , a  considerable  number of  the  so-called  beautiful  things  came   out  of   wars  . Indeed , one  of  the  illustrations  is  of   the   Tomb of  Britain's  Unknown  Warrior  of  WWl  in  Westminster  Abbey . 

Another is  the dramatic statue  of  Peace , with  wings, flying  over  London. The "Great War " coverage includes  extracts from  speeches made  by Woodrow Wilson  about  America's entry into the  war  and  after  the   conflict. 

In the latter , he  recalled  how he had ridden through  the  streets of European capitals and  heard  cries for  the League of Nations  (to be formed ) from the lips of people who had no particular notion  of  how it  was  to be done , but  whose  hearts  said  something  must  come  of  this .

On the  monetary cost of  wars  it was stated  the amount spent on war could clothe every man, woman and child in an attire of  which  kings and queens would be proud . A  school house could be  built in  every valley  on Earth ,  a place of  worship  could be  built on  every  hillside . 

There is a short quote  from Australian poet and horseman  Adam Lindsay Gordon about life being mostly froth and bubble, however, kindness  in another's trouble  and  courage on your own , stand out . 

There are  stirring  items from Captain Robert  Falcon Scott, one written as he lay dying  in his  tent  in  Antarctica .

Under the  heading, The Price of Freedom , there is a short speech from  the  Italian   general   Garibaldi to  his soldiers. The  death of  Admiral Nelson , Captain Francis  Drake  ; the  Crimean war and other  conflicts are   mentioned. 

The  contents list includes a heading  Babies and battles which carried the message that  when  the  world was  consumed by  the  march of  Napoleon , in one year  , between the  battles of  Trafalgar and  Waterloo, God arranged for a  host of  heroes  to be born into the world .

Gladstone  was born  in Liverpool ; Tennyson at  the Somersby Rectory ; Oliver  Wendell Holmes  in  Massachusetts ; Charles Darwin also made his debut at Shrewsbury ; Abraham Lincoln  drew  his first breath in old Kentucky ; music  was  enriched  by  the  advent of  Felix  Mendelsson  at  Hamburg .

This, it continued, was proof that  God did not need  battalions to  manage his world  - he used "beautiful babies ."  When  a wrong wanted righting , or a truth wanted  preaching , or a continent wanted  opening , God sent a baby  into  the  world  to  do  it .

FORTY DAYS AND FORTY NIGHTS SOGGY ELECTION REPORT

 God is  raining on Clive  Palmer's Circus .

One of God's close assistants , a  fallen and  wet  angel , who refused to be named , told  top political reporter Argus Tuft  that  Palmer  gets about on Earth as if  he is God Almighty , which angers Our  Father, who  is omnipotent. The angel went on to say an   example of   the  Lord's   influence  on  the  planet  was the fact that  the ABC reported   He  received   more media  coverage  over  Easter  than  Palmer's  massive  paid   election  advertisements    across    all   platforms  and  a  rerun  of  the  sinking  of  the Titanic . 

Meanwhile , as the election campaign heats / wets  up, it  has  been  raining so  heavily on  Magnetic Island   vehicles and  office  equipment   are  starting  to  float  away  in the  Jewel in the Crown .   

Rubbish  washed  down Gustav Creek   is  also floating about in the  island's  safe  harbour .

Word has just come through that our Aeronautical Correspondent - Abra- armed  with an umbrella  and a  fleecy- lined flying jacket  , has  flown  to  Cairns to report on  that   drenched   city .  

ROCK HOPPING ISLAND WALLABY WITH WAVE RIDING BARGE BACKGROUND

Vallis  photo.

 

BUSH STONE- CURLEW BALANCING ACT : ONE LEG AT A TIME ON A WINDY MORNING

 

Vallis photos. 

SKY OVER ALMA BAY ; BEACH GOUGED BY RAIN-SWOLLEN CREEK

Magnetic  Island.  Abra photograph .

 

NEW SMASH HIT COOKING SHOW

Little    Darwin is  proud to announce   what  the nation  is   crying  out  for  in these  disease  ridden ,  finger  lickin'   and  looming  tough times-  a  brand  new  television  series  informing  Scott Morrison's obviously constipated  "quiet  Australians " ,  way  past  their  use  by  date , how  to  cook  baked  beans   in   a  10001  ways  in a desperate  bid to make  them  fit  for human  consumption .

It has a catchy title, COOKING  WITH  GECKO  . As the name implies, the celebrity chef is  a typical  Aussie  Gecko  who rules every kitchen  in the  tropics.   Having   just  downed  a  tasty  blowfly  , our  Gecko, named Ramsay , is  about  to  dash  on  stage , above,  and  rip open  a  tin  of  tasteless  baked  beans  , using a  Flo  Bjelke-Petersen  recipe ,  and free castor oil scones  to  almost  make  them  edible .   

WET TROPICAL CITY : TOWNSVILLE

Wet  and  windy.Vallis series .

WATERFRONT BIRDLIFE

Swallows , Magnetic Island  ferry  landing .

Like black and white minstrels , Magpies , above,  singing for  supper at Townsville  ferry terminal ; one scavenging   at  nearby  tables  .

 

Young Magpie.

Plovers  in  for a dip .

PM'S CRANIUM IN SENSATIONAL NORTH QUEENSLAND ELECTION SHOCK

Shipping Reporter Scoop 

The latest  outrage on Magnetic Island's  mystery  mermaid is the placing of  what appears to be  Scott Morrison's pop-eyed  head  on   her  poor  decapitated  and  armless  body , as  this exclusive  photograph reveals. 

Sitting up on a rock at the entrance to the island , ScoMo , sporting a  tail ,looks all  the world like a beguiling Rhine siren who lures  sailors and silly voters to  their  doom .

The  following  full frontal view will probably  excite  desperate , boofheaded  National Party  yokels , as  well  as United  Australia  Party  lost souls -Craig Kelly as PM !!!!!!!!! God alone knows what  attracts jokers  to   PHON.                                     .     

A member of the PM's personal staff , who refused to be named , said  the  PM  owns a  goldfish , which is kept in  a bowl  in  the cubby house he built , and  is  also  very sympathetic  towards mermaids  as  they listen attentatively to his campaign spiel, which  includes  much  tasty  codswallop   and   repeated   raw   prawn   attacks  on   the   ALP . 

Meanwhile , in another  piscatorial  election development ,  the  Mad as Hell  sea monster, the Kraken , recovering from  a bad touch of    bleaching  on the Great Barrier Reef, has emerged  from the Shaun Micallef all  singing all dancing sanatorium , wearing  an It's time ! T-shirt  , urging all  right thinking  Australians, a rapidly diminishing commodity , to  vote  ALP  and help him  suck  down  all  of  Putin's warships .

A RARE AUSTRALIAN ART OFFER

Entitled Still life with Japanese  figure, this  1929 original   linocut  with watercolour by Australian   graphic  artist and painter  Erik  Anchor Thake , is  on sale by Douglas  Stewart  Fine Books, Melbourne, for $3300.

One of the first Australian artists to work in a surrealistic  manner , he challenged  the  conservative  standards . Thake  attended   night  classes  at  the National Gallery in  Victoria. Later he studied under  Kew  born painter , draughtsman and teacher  George Henry Frederick  Bell who  had  studied  overseas,  including Paris, elected a member of the Modern Society of Portrait Painters, London , in 1908, exhibited  in  Europe and America.

During WWl  Bell  had worked in munitions ,served as an official  war artist  and returned to  Australia in l920. He  became  the  art critic for the Melbourne Sun-News-Pictorial for  25 years.    

 In  the case of Thake ,  he also became  an official war artist for the Royal  Australian  Air  Force  during WWll . He was  prominent  in  industrial design ,typography ,layout and illustration, designed  many bookplates. Signed  by Thake in  pencil , in  a  black  timber frame .